Full Moons and Asperger's do NOT mix!

GAH! I hate full moons!! W had a crappy day, after having a couple of weeks with great behavior. He got upset with coloring a cover for his poetry book at school, got rude with his aide, threw away his colored pencils, then made her dig them out of the trash. He got a 1 hour detention for that. Then, at lunch, he was all grumbly, making faces at me, and sat in the corner of the cafeteria away from everyone. I tried talking to him, but it seemed to make it worse. Then he got up and left the cafeteria to go to the seclusion desk in the hall w/o permission. I had the other monitor go talk to him since he was angry and wouldn't listen to me. He listened to her for a bit, then ran past her, up the stairs, and out the door into the courtyard! Another aide went up the stairs and got him, and he has another 1 hour detention for that stunt. He seriously has to learn to control his anger and impulse behavior.

yelling in my son's face?! seriously?

I'm having some issues (to put it mildly) with W's teacher. I had several 6th grade students tell me that W accidentally broke a piece off a project that a 6th grader had made (lower grades were allowed to view and test the circuit boards made by 6th graders) and when he told his teacher he didn't break it on purpose, she called him a liar, told him to stop lying to her, and continued to yell in his face. These students told me individually, all stating the exact same story of what happened. They also said they felt badly about how W had been treated. I e-mailed the principal (she told me to talk to the teacher) so I e-mailed the teacher and cc'd the principal. I am livid.

This week has been so emotionally taxing, and it's not even over yet! We had a special ed. meeting Monday to go over some concerns I have for W and his handwriting and behavior issues. I'm asking for an OT Eval and skills assessment to determine if his aversion to writing is a physical one or because he can't put his thoughts onto paper. Both are common problems for Aspies, but it seems like his gen ed. teacher and spec. ed. teacher are unaware of Asperger's and some of its hindrances.

He had a puppet play at his primary school today, and yesterday he was super anxious about it. He asked if he could stay home and not participate, or maybe go to the Spec. Ed. teacher's room while the rest of his class went. I sent an e-mail to his teachers and the principal asking if he could not go to avoid the potential of a melt down, which would NOT be good for anyone. He did wind up going, participating, and enjoying the play, proving me a liar once again. *sigh  The 4th graders are to put on this puppet play again tomorrow, but this time for parents. William told me he's staying home because he doesn't want to do it for the grown ups, especially me. I told him he's going to school, but ask to go to the Spec. Ed. room if he doesn't want to perform. I won't go see him, if he doesn't want me to. No biggie.

Work was exceptionally trying today. 5th grade is our roughest class as we have a handful of boys that just will NOT listen to us or do what is requested. The entire grade has silent lunch this week after being overall obnoxious last Friday and not lowering their voices after 4 requests to do so. 80+ kids in the small cafeteria can get really loud, really quickly. Today we took off points to those who talked, despite getting warned not to. My co-worker took points off 2 girls who sat and talked after being warned, and they are 2 of the better students. When she gave the slips to their teacher for discipline, the teacher asked rudely "are these for real?!" Um, yes... rules apply to everyone, not just for the 'bad boys'. Chances are, points won't be taken off, even though they didn't obey rules. It frustrated both of us, and they rest of the day just sucked as a result. And, to make matters worse, 2 of the 5th graders that are in W's den said that someone in his class is having a 'petition' saying that I baby him too much. Um, he's eating lunch this week with the asst. principal because he had a meltdown one day last week, sassed me, and threw his id on the floor. That's not exactly babying him. Plus, I yell at him more than any other student. I don't take points off for him, but then again, I don't really take points off anyone's planner for 4th grade.

To top the day off, I get a call from a former co-worker saying that rumor has it that my current co-worker (and friend) ripped off id tags from kids today. I told her, that she has never taken anyone's tag in the 3 months she's been here. She may have lifted a tag to get a name off it since she doesn't know all the students yet, but she's never taken one... let alone ripped one off a kid's neck! I can only imagine what the kids say about me! I'm so glad that spring break begins Monday; it can't get here soon enough!

Quirkiness and awkward

One of the 8th graders tells me today during lunch that some kids think William is annoying. My response was "I know, but he's autistic, he can't help it." His response was "really? I didn't know that." the girl sitting by him said "where have you been? that's why she has that puzzle tattoo on her arm." He then said "wow, I guess I'd better pay more attention. I didn't know." He also said he would say something to the girls (who are also in 4th grade, W's age) at the bus stop.  This boy wasn't being mean, he was just letting me know that some kids are talking about W. I appreciate that he told me this, I just wish we had some autism spectrum education for the kids so they aren't so quick to judge others who may appear to act differently than they do. You can't see autism, but you can see its quirkiness and awkwardness. :(

W has one friend who he sits with at lunch every day; if he doesn't sit with this friend, a huge meltdown ensues. Sometimes, this friend will sit with one of 2 other boys, and deliberately not leave room for W to invoke a meltdown. This friend is also very mean to W when sitting by one of these 2 boys. W is sometimes oblivious to this, and still wants him to be his friend. They even asked me about a play date for today after school. I don't get it. They have so much in common, and both are quirky, but this boy can be very mean when with these 2 other boys.

Uggghhh

So, W had a detention to serve last week for getting 3 points taken off his planner. I picked him up at 3:30 in front of the school, no big deal.

Fast forward to Wednesday: I get a call from his PE teacher to schedule his detention. Um, I said, "he served that at the front office last week, and I picked him up at 3:30." Come to find out, W just stood in the foyer the entire time, going in and out of the doors. When asked what he was doing, he said, "waiting for my mom to pick me up at 3:30." He was RIGHT there by the front office, WTH didn't he just go there and sit for that 1/2 hour?

Then, he LIED about serving the detention to everyone! He told me, his teacher, his PE teacher, and admin that he served it and didn't recant until his teacher got off the phone with the front office to verify. So, he's in even bigger trouble for lying now. He has to serve a Saturday school from 8-10 am next weekend. He is grounded from the tablet and any video games; we were going to go see Mr. Peabody and Sherman as the Lights Up, Sounds Down movie, but we aren't now. I'm so frustrated with him. I have no idea what goes through that kid's mind sometimes.

It's bad enough that he is 'that kid' that makes teachers cringe because of his defiance, fidgeting, and impulsiveness from his Asperger's; now he's also going to be known as a liar. This year has been exceptionally rough on him, and he's not making it any easier on himself.

Parent Teacher Conferences suck

I met with my son's 4th grade teacher Thursday, and I've been fuming ever since. I spent 1/2 hour hearing nothing but negatives about him. His behavior is up and down and not improving over all. He hates to write and often has meltdowns when required to. He fidgets in his chair, especially when others are giving speeches/demonstrations.

Um, Hello... he has Asperger's. Every problem he has is a symptom of this. I had asked last year that he be tested for dysgraphia, but that never came to fruition. He knows the information if you ask him, he just can't write it. I had also asked that he be able to type his written assignments or have someone as a scribe. Both of those ideas were shot down. It's like they are setting him up to fail! I have no idea what to do. His IEP isn't as specific as it should be; and I'm just now catching it. He had a great year last year, so it was incorrectly assumed that he would do well this year as well.

He is at a new school, has new teachers, new aides, new staff, new principal: none of them KNOW him. None of them care to find out what bothers him. We are starting ALL over and it's been rough. Aspies are not known for transitions to begin with, and he's getting no support. When he has problems writing, his teacher tells him to 'suck it up'. So much for getting help with his disability.

I just printed out 20+ pages from the OASIS Guide to Asperger's for his Gen. Ed. teacher and Spec. Ed. teacher because apparently neither has experience with Asperger's. I just need to write a tactful letter to go with the handouts to give to them. Telling them that 'here's something to help you do your job for my son' just might not cut it.